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How to Text Women on Dating Apps (And 10 Messages You Can Copy Right Now)
So you’ve matched with someone on a dating app—nice work. Now comes the part where most guys get stuck: sending that first message.
Let’s be real: “Hey” isn’t enough. And “How are you?”? Snooze fest. If you want a real shot at getting a response, you’ve got to show that you actually looked at her profile, you’ve got something to say, and—big one—you know how to spark a vibe without being a try-hard.
Here’s the secret:
Compliment something specific. Connect it to you. And throw in a playful invite or idea.
Something like this:
“Hey, I really like that you’re into sewing and writing. I’m kind of a big writer myself. I’d love to bounce some ideas around with you sometime.”
Boom. That’s confident, personal, and it opens a door to conversation.
Want more like that? Here are 10 first messages you can literally copy, paste, and send right now:
10 Dating App Messages That Actually Work
1.
“Your love for hiking and photography is awesome. I take terrible photos but I’m always up for an adventure—want to team up for a ‘bad photographer, great view’ hike?”
2.
“You said you’re into baking… I feel like this is the perfect time to confess that I once burned cookies from a pre-made pack. Think you could save me?”
3.
“You’re into books and boxing? That’s a combo I didn’t know I needed to meet. I’ve got a few reading recs if you’ve got training tips.”
4.
“Okay, a dog lover and a plant whisperer? I just have one cactus and he’s hanging on for dear life. Want to help me keep him alive?”
5.
“You play guitar? That’s insanely cool. I’ve always wanted to learn—how much do I have to bribe you for a one-song lesson?”
6.
“You had me at ‘loves sushi and bad horror movies.’ That’s literally my perfect night. Should we argue about which horror movie is most underrated?”
7.
“You’re into running marathons? Respect. I run… late. But I’m a good cheerleader if you ever need one.”
8.
“You said you love to travel. Serious question: do you have a dream destination or are you more of a spontaneous ‘book it and go’ person?”
9.
“Your art is actually amazing—I wish I could even draw a decent stick figure. What inspires your style?”
10.
“You seem like someone who’s got really good taste in music. I’m building a playlist of songs that feel like the start of a rom-com—got any recommendations?”
Final Tips Before You Hit Send:
• Read her profile first: Seriously. The message should show you noticed something about her.
• Be confident, not cocky: It’s fine to be playful and bold, but stay respectful.
• Ask something open-ended: Give her something easy to reply to.